Over all I am a health concious, most of the time eating well person but some days I just loose it. The most exhausting days I need to have fatty food, aerated  drinks, chocolates, fried Indian snacks and occasionally licking a spoon of ghee. 

Recently son was down with viral fever. Poor thing he caught it on our way back home, I secretly think the English still don’t like us, they did it to us… Just kidding I love the  English and long live the queen! boy 90 years and still ruling!  She seems to be like the mother-in-law no matter how old she grows never gives up her kitchen, never stops interfering. I wonder will she ever give it up for her son cause when he actually becomes the king he will be like “oh I can’t do this, I am too old for this!” like lethal weapon.. Ha ha ha ha!

Back home as son was not well he just wanted to do  two things. First option “bhar jaiyee…bhar jaiyee (lets go out)”, he would repeat it over and over again second option “mumma…mumma”, poor thing down with high fever all he wanted was me. 

Outside I behaved all calm and composed but inside all thoughts where panicking, “oh why doesn’t the fever go? Why is it increasing?should I call the doctor and disturb him for the 3rd time, oh now I need to go to the bathroom” maybe it was anxiety…

Everyone calls my son ‘mavadiyo'(mumma’s boy), when he is unwell he is mavadiyo at his best. He just wants to sit next to me with his hand on my stomach… 

With grandma, grandpa, papa, aunt all at his service all he demands “no no mama you do it”

From the smallest thing like if he wants water or a spoon, “mumma ape”

I still wanted to go to the bathroom, he would not leave me…so I tell him, “beta mumma really wants to go, I don’t wear a daiper like you, Please..”


“Ok then could you share one of your daipers next time”

In a deep singing voice “Nooo…nooooo”on the iPad nursery rhymes video is playing, “rain rain go away” with water and rain noises and visuals,trust me the urgue to go intensifies 

Finally grandpa snaps at me “if you want to go just go you do not need to tell him, just sneek out”

I roll my eyes,”dad he is sitting half on my lap, his hand is on my stomach, you think he will not notice”

So grandpa takes him from me and tries to divert, he tell him “see lets see your videos on my phone” looks at me and say “go…go run”

I run as if I have a 5 second window to escape, as I am in the bathroom I can here “mummma…. Mumma” ok I don’t think a mom of a sick baby can even pee in peace..or maybe a mom can never pee in peace..ha ha ha. 

By now he comfortable in grandpa’s lap playing with his phone which is a compormise for my outdoor loving baby but can’t help it.

My husband who is right now in our son’s blacklist as he holds him when we pour medicines down his throat,( by the ways thanks to Oedipus  theory, I am never blamed 😊)  has nothing to do as our son pushes him away when he wants to help, “No mumma” watching television advises me “oh just sit back relax”

I ignore his words I go in the kitchen to prepare his dinner inspite the fact that I know he is only going to have milk.

All day we watch animation movies and nursery rhymes videos. 

In my head at night when son finally sleeps, theses are the things that run …

“one potato.. Two potato.. Three potato jump..”

“how much is the fever?”

“Little boy blue…”

“Tom  fever should go, thank god he has his smile on.”

“Old mac donald had a farm”

Its like the nursery rhymes are stuck in my head.. Damm it! I am already fed up during the day..  

During all these crazy days all healthy food are out of the window… Its indulgence time and Paneer Makhani, is one of those indugence fatty foods,  I do not even feel guilty to eat it.

First time I tried paneer makhanni it was 2004, I still remember the year, I asked my sister to taste it, it was so bad she threw it all away, I bet she still remembers the disgusting taste and told me “its ok di, please don’t try cooking ever again” Thank God I have a persistent nature.This recipe almost took 12 years after trying over and over again. I love my makhani so much, maybe its my narcissistic  nature, may be its actually that good, try it and decide.

In Fact after many photographs I finally got this nearer to perfection photograph. I am really happy with the result.


[Serves 3]
1 and half  cup tomato gravy

1 onion cut into big pieces

5 cashew nuts

4 cloves of garlic

1/2 inch ginger

1 tbsp oil

2 tbsp butter

1/2 bay leaf

1/2 inch cinnamon

1 green cardamoms

2 cloves

2 peppercorns

1/2 cup milk

1 tbsp tomato ketup

200 grams of panner cut into cubes

1 tbsp of tikka masala or garam masala

1 tsp dried fenugreek leaves

1 to 2 tsp sugar [according to preference]

2 tbsp kasmiri red chili powder

salt to taste


Heat 1 tbsp of oil add the onions, ginger, garlic and cashwenuts sauté till the onions are brown.Grind all this ingredient in a smooth gravy like paste. Add water if needed

In a pan heat the butter, add the bay leaf, cinnamon, cardamons, cloves, peppercorns, tomato puree, the previously mixed gravy, red chili powder and cook till the butter separates.
Add the milk, tomato ketup, simmer for 5 minutes.

Add the paneer, garam masala, dried fenugreek leaves, sugar and salt, you can also add 1/2 cup water to adjust the consistency of the gravy. Cook for about 5 minutes. 

Serve with naan, paratha, roti or rice.

An excellent recipe to cook when you have guests, its always a hit.

But well its a fatty food, when I am exhausted I don’t care how many calories it contains I just want to eat rich food, like the kings use to eat…

And about the double chin.. Well being a mommy may be its allowed.. Maybe no one will notice 😉

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